Move dating into relationship
If your date encourages you to date other people, it’s not because he wants to experience the enlightenment that comes with multiple dinner-plans partners; he’s just not into you enough to want you all to himself.
If he’s still dating other people — and you’re at a stage where you feel you should be exclusive — then he’s not ready to commit to anyone.
Another reason it made more sense for me to move to Drew rather than for him to move to me is because I was finishing grad school when we met and was at a logical place in my life to start over somewhere new.
I was already in a place of transition, so it didn’t matter as much whether the next step took place in Chicago or in New York. Does either of you have strong climate preferences that make your partner’s location particularly desirable or undesirable?
If you don’t find the info you need in this column, please visit the Dear Wendy archives or the forums (you can even start your own thread), or submit a question for advice.
One of the reasons Drew was opposed to making the move in our long-distance relationship is because his father, a widower of many, many years, was getting on in age (he’s almost 94 now) and Drew knew how important it would be for him to remain physically close to help with any care-giving.
I, on the other hand, lived in a city where I had zero family, let alone family who were in any way dependent on me. Is one of you at a place in your education, career, or life that makes moving more feasible in the near future than it is for the other?
It just happens to be blue with big clouds floating by all the time). Does either of you have family who are physically (or emotionally) dependent on you?
Conversely: is either of you so physically or emotionally dependent on family that you can’t leave them?